No one, I mean no one, wants to buy $750M triple decker jumbo jets from...
(wait for it)
the Irish.
(let that sink in a little)
Where? Where do you ask does someone come by such insight? Well, for me it's as simple as working in the front yard. Almost out of the blue I hear a voice, not a clear voice, but a voice, demanding to be heard. When I look up, he's there, standing at the street looking down at me with a sort of nervous benevolence. My mind begins to wonder what truths will he convey. What crumb from the vastness of him will he allow me to nibble at? But then the voice becomes clear, and I know then that my hopes are for naught. All he has to offer is crap like avoiding huge passenger airliners built in Ireland.
Yup. That's my crazy motherfucking neighbor. I only wish one of two things. One, that he would stop coming around or in lieu of that, that I could remember more of the things he expounds upon.
Tonight was actually only the second night that he's wandered by, though I've had several other very uncomfortable and awkward conversations with him before. And no, he's not mentally handicapped, if that's what you were thinking, at least not in the way his demeanor might imply. No, mostly what he is is desperate to have something worthwhile to add to the world, and I guess if that means I have to listen to his inane bullshit while I work in the front yard, well maybe that's a small price to pay.
Although it definitely loses something with my poor translation, I'll try to convey some of his other amazing thoughts. Tonight's encounter was filled with wonder, though almost entirely as non-sequitorial stream of consciousness. And I think virtually all of it was a lie built around tiny kernels of truth.
He doesn't read non-fiction. He likes fiction. Particularly books about World War II because that stuff really happened. (that's almost a verbatim quote)
He doesn't have much good to say about those in charge during The Depression, what with all the cheap newspaper that could have been printed as money. You can't let stuff like The Depression catch you by surprise.
Also, not a big fan of those in this country during the same era that weren't building tanks and bombers prior to WWII so that we didn't have to work so hard once it started.
A big fan of farm and fishing subsidies. People need to eat. He once bought 3oo acres (by which he seemed to imply a vast plot of land, clearly having no idea what an acre looks like and whether 300 of them is a lot) from the son of a farmer that did not want to work the land after his father died. By buying the land (and all the equipment etc.) he wanted to ensure that the land wasn't just left unproductive. This story sort of petered out with no real resolution.
He's told me about several huge corporations, oddly that I've never heard of. (he usually mentions the name first and asks if I've heard of them before continuing) Inevitably he's had direct conversations with the head of these corporations and has apparently shared these morsels of wisdom with them too.
He wanted to be a steel engineer (whatever that is) for a while, so much so that he learned about several steel producing companies that have contracts with the Department of Defense to provide steel. In return the Department of Defense has the Mint print these companies any money they want, for as he made clear, we've got to have battleships.
He dipped his toe lightly into the history of William Carnegie (actually his name was Andrew - Scottish fellow, made lots of money in steel, built libraries all over America) but didn't get too far with that.
Through it all there seem to have developed three threads. Steel, agriculture and money. Not sure what to make of that composition. I'll have to wait to see how things flesh out tomorrow night when my personal ghost of Christmas bullshit happens by.
And while I mumble under my breath hoping someone will kill me, I paly along, for it hurts me not at all to make his day a little brighter.
7 comments:
We all encounter these various characters in our lives who blather & blather with some need to, in their mind, contribute. A person like this has a thirst for knowledge but not for any higher purpose than to allow for further blathering. There's not much self-esteem there, but to blather is to remain relevant in the world. Whether or not he/she gets the whole story, the context, or the meaning behind facts, stories, and histories that they encounter is not important. Only that they have more blather fodder. It reminds me actually of having a conversation with my mom. She's not truly interested in a word I say. She's just on the lookout for sound bytes that she can pass along the family grapevine.
On a side note: steel, agriculture, money. This guy would be a perfect governor for your island in Utopia.
At least it seems to provide a bit of amusement. My coworker won't shut up. And he makes what appear to be jokes that leave me and my other coworker staring at each other dumbfounded. I've stopped being polite, and simply give an irritated grunt when he talks at me. At first I felt kind of bad, but he doesn't seem to notice the difference.
Utopia, long may you reign.
Only thing worse than the blathering idiot is the unwelcome house guest that can't tell the difference between hospitality and hostility. That's Todd T. (of The Shirt fame) territory.
We have one of those. He stops by, stands around and gives home improvement advice at best, and at his worst he stands in my kitchen talking to me until I turn off the lights, long after his drunk wife has wandered home.
Again, there are far worse things, but jeez.
Dear God. That IS Todd T. 98% of the world's population would have a sudden surge of embarassment and self loathing the minute the "host" at a house we were visiting flicked the lights off for the night while we're still talking to them. But not these guys. They deserve a nice chapter near the front of the Gibbons/Hylton Tome of Master Psychology.
Very interesting. I'll add also, scary. You never know when a conversation like that might take a truly dark turn. And this being a repeat visitor, and from the sounds of it so far, I would say it is likely. Watch your back.
On another note - this marks my first post from my NEW and IMPROVED computer/internet connection situation!!
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